Every once in a while, I get an email from The Daily Wellness with great simple tips to improve wellness. I recently received one that I really resonated with. It made me feel like I’m not crazy, or alone. As I was reading it, I was thinking, “You mean it’s not just me?! Maybe I’m not actually “doing social situations” wrong!?”
I’m thinking that you might resonate with it, too, and benefit from the suggestions, so I am sharing their email with you here. Enjoy!
The Question: “Why do I get so emotionally drained after hanging out with people, even people I like?”
The Response: You're not imagining it, and there's nothing wrong with you. This is something often heard from clients who identify as introverted, emotionally sensitive, or simply very present in their relationships.
Here’s what’s happening: Social interaction requires more than just conversation. Your brain is doing rapid-fire work in the form of reading tone, processing body language, navigating group dynamics, and managing your own emotional responses in real time. Even in relaxed or loving company, your system is still engaged and working hard.
And here’s the part that surprises many people: Even joyful or fulfilling interactions can still leave you feeling wiped out. That doesn’t mean the connection wasn’t real or worthwhile, it just means your energy has limits, and it was fully used.
You’re not exhausted because anything went wrong. You’re exhausted because you showed up with your whole self.
One Small Step: Start building in a post-social buffer. Give yourself 10–20 minutes of quiet after any kind of connection, whether it’s a phone call, a meeting, or dinner with friends. No stimulation, no demands. Just space to recalibrate.
Try This:
- Sitting in your car a few minutes before heading inside.
- Taking a short walk around the block or into another room.
- Lying down for a body scan or breathing exercise.
Then say to yourself: “This is me refuelling after connection.” Creating that buffer can help you enjoy your relationships more and recover faster. It’s not avoidance, it’s maintenance. The more you honour your rhythms, the more sustainable the connection becomes.
Here’s to conquering stress.
With heart,
Louise
The Stress Experts
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