Can You Take Back Your Power?

Things are different now, but several years ago, I was really trying to lose weight. Diets. Exercise. The whole shebang.

I would stand on the scale daily so that I could track my progress.

I remember there were several days I’d get up in the morning and feel good - I’d look in the mirror and think “Yeah, this is good. I’m looking healthier. I’m doing it. Good job, Louise.” I’d feel like I was making progress and that life was good.

Smiling and inwardly celebrating, I’d walk to the bathroom, excitedly thinking, “Surely the scale is going to show this change!”

After taking off my clothes (no one stands on a scale with all the extra weight of pyjamas! LOL), I step on the scale. I wait those few moments for the numbers to stop moving around, anticipating the validation of what I feel.

BAM! Insult! My heart sinks. “A pound higher!! How is this possible?! I’m such a loser. An idiot. A good-for-nothing.” I look down at my body, then up into the mirror, disgusted. “How could I not see the truth that I see now? The love handles, the arm sag, the gut. UGH.”

I step off the scale. Deflated. Defeated. A failure. I think, “Let’s just get this day over with.”

Maybe you can relate?

I let the number on the scale dictate how I felt about myself and about life. When the scale was good, I felt good; when it was bad, I felt bad. Isn’t it funny that we tend to rely on external factors to tell us how we should feel?

I wasn’t standing on the scale daily to track my progress, I was standing on the scale to guide how I should feel. But natural daily fluctuations make the scale almost just as random as a Magic8 ball. “Can I feel good about myself today?” Shake-a. Shake-a. Shake-a… “My reply is no.”

Not only did I then feel bad about myself, I unconsciously learned that I can’t trust myself or my feelings. “Look how wrong I was? I thought I was feeling good, but the scale says I should feel like sh!t. Ok, scale, you’re right, I’m wrong.” And I further hand over to the scale the power over my feelings.

Thankfully, I finally recognized what was happening and took back my power. Now I no longer stand on the scale; I don’t even own one.